Thursday, January 31, 2013

Reflections


Luke 4:14-21
Jan 27, 2013

My trip to Haiti was unexpected, out of the blue, if you will. The week before Christmas, reading my email, I came across Trinity’s newsletter.  In the Tidings was a last minute call to fill last minute vacancies on a mission trip to Haiti in just a few weeks. I don’t recall knowing the details of that trip or that there was to be another trip in April, but instead, I felt a small leap in my heart to pay attention and to pray.  Impulsively, as if someone else took over my hands, I typed an email message to Rev. Jonathan Wright-Gray to find out more about the trip, not sure that I could or would go; but that I was praying about it.

Through prayer and talking with my family, it became clear and apparent to me that I should go….to build a chicken coop for an orphanage. I did not know why. It is still not clear to me why, but that is okay. I don’t need to know why; I just know I was supposed to be there.

What came to mind, for me, was a theological reflection that I had written several years ago.  It was an experience of prayer for me; where my thoughts started in one place and ended in a totally different and unexpected place.  A reflection that, at some point, I was just the writer….not the author.  It was a prayer that led me into images of Jesus sitting in the temple; teaching. It led me to an image of being surrounded by music in the air. It led me to a vision of sitting in a dusty, dry environment surrounded by dark, little faces smiling at me…..and we could speak the same language…understanding one another.

These images and reflections kept rising up in my mind.

Sharing my experience in Haiti runs the risk of seeming like a lengthy slide show presentation of the family vacation through the Grand Canyon of which I subject a group of my closest friends who stare blankly but politely at images that become a blur.  Instead, I feel called to share with you, not so much my experience in Haiti, but rather, my experience with God throughout this Mission.

It is really about turning my will and my life over to God’s care and protection.

There were detours thrown in my path before traveling.  About 12 hours after booking my flights and committing to this trip, I had a little health scare. An episode that, another time may have induced enough fear to deter me from going.  This time, I never faltered; I truly felt a peace and a calm …that it was just an awareness that I needed to take certain steps to protect myself; travel with precautionary medicines that I would not otherwise carry.

Trust and rely on God…it is out of my control. It is in God’s hands.

The week before travel, the State Department put out a warning to US Citizens traveling to Haiti. Half of our group dropped out. But, truly, I never felt I should not go. I knew in my heart I needed to be there; still not knowing why.  And I have no doubt that those who did not go; God was speaking to them as well. For some reason, they were not supposed to be on that trip.

As it turns out, if the whole group had gone, it would have posed a challenge to the organizers of the Haitian Baptist Convention, who were our hosts, as vehicles and ground transportation were limited and often faced with mechanical difficulties. They would have found a way to make it work but it would have been more difficult to have 12 or 13 people in our group instead of 8.

And the project of building the chicken farm, at times, did not have enough tasks to keep everyone working for periods of time.  With more people there to work, it could have posed a potential frustration.

But, it is in God’s hands; out of our control….and it worked out the way it was supposed to.

This morning, as I reflected on today’s reading from Luke, it struck me in a most profound way - emotional. As I studied the text and the preceding verses where the temptation of Jesus takes place in the wilderness, I relate to the temptations that could have allowed me to take my will back, to not trust and rely on God’s protection, to withdraw from the trip.

In this morning’s reading, Jesus is filled with the power of the Holy Spirit and returns to Galilee.  This is the beginning of Jesus’ Galilean ministry…”…to bring good news to the poor; to proclaim release to the captives, and recovery of sight to the blind, to let the oppressed go free.”

We arrived in Port au Prince, Haiti on Saturday, January 12 on the third anniversary of the earthquake that opened the eyes of the world on this desolate place. My introduction to Haiti involved a bombardment of men trying to assist with luggage not taking “no" for an answer.


The drive to the guest house was wild - an assault on the eyes, a shock to all senses, a challenge to the soul.  Sights and sounds that overwhelm.  Here to help what appears to be the impossible.  Where is the good?  Where to begin while grappling with the intrusion of fear - fear of safety, fear of potential violence, fear of disease, fear of not being able to make a difference.


FEAR… and yet the words enter my head, “Trust and rely on God.  It is in God’s hands.”

And the words enter my heart, “Trust and rely on God.  It is in God’s hands.”

And the words enter my soul, “Trust and rely on God.  It is in God’s hands.”

I AM IN GOD’S HANDS.

And all shifts into neutral.  I surrender.

Perhaps this is where God steps in to numb the senses, embrace my heart and safeguard my soul.  For here is the place in my being where room is made; to neutralize and to level the person I am; to make room for the person I am about to become.

From the beginning, we began to meet the missionaries who were serving with the Haitian Baptist Convention.  Strangers, our hosts upon arrival; friends sharing tearful farewells by week’s end.  We met Deliris, a woman from Puerto Rico, educated at Andover Newton Theological School, and commissioned by American Baptist Churches to serve in Haiti. We met a couple, Uta and Andy from Europe who met and fell in love on a Mercy Ship; Uta a nurse and Andy a mechanic who are supported through overseas Baptist conventions as well as some support from ABC.  And through connections, resources and prayer Uta and Andy were expecting to meet with Heifer Project this past week to plan a partnership to bring rabbits to 800 families in the mountains.  We met Ann from Scotland, serving in Haiti as a missionary as well.

The Pastor’s family hosted us at their home for dinner toward the end of the week.  We had heard stories of their home being attacked by neighborhood gangs in the month prior to our arrival. They had to move.  But we witnessed an angel at his home, his daughter who sang to us. Here is a reflection Rev. Jonathan Wright-Gray:

Her hands floated gracefully
In the air,
Gently accenting the sweet, floating music of her voice:
“If I were the wind…,
If I were the rain…,
If I were the sun…”
The bright yellow of her blouse
Offset the rich brown of her skin.
She did not face her audience directly,
She turned to the side, eyes closed—
Her song was as much an ethereal prayer
As performance.

This lyrical flower of a girl in what would seem
The harshest of places—
On a bumpy, graveled street of Delmas,
Port-au-Prince, Haiti,
Nurtured by her father/pastor
Who accompanies her song.
 The sweet lightness in her voice is
So different from the clinging neediness one can find
At the orphanage her father oversees a few blocks away.

Why should he not want to protect her,
Give her the gentle nurture of the Spirit
As much as he can?
She is the flower
Growing up from the cracked pavement.

When, how, will she encounter the
Harsh realities of her world?
(Already her family had to move away
From angry neighbors who
Attacked them in their own home
Over some dispute with her father’s church.)

He knows she will see the world’s anger
Soon enough—
Perhaps she has already—
Though this moment of lilting reverie
Makes it seems so far removed.

If he is wise, her father knows he cannot shield her,
Only give her a love that
Can take root in her soul, and
Pray she will choose to face the world with
Love’s inner strength and that
Her song will grow richer,
Deeper, as it encounters the world.

At the orphanage, we were welcomed by the enthusiasm of children clamoring for our affection…some children torn between being held and nurtured; tightly holding on with arms wrapped around our necks vs. playing a game or drawing with crayons and relinquishing that place of comfort.  Among the donated items transported were clothing for the children at the orphanage we served…delivered one day, being proudly worn the next when we came to visit; one little skirt still adorned by the store tags.


I witnessed the coming together of a culture gap and a gender gap at the building of the chicken farm.








What seemed the impossible on Monday...
...became a miracle on Friday.









This is mission.  Culture shock, adjusting and changing as a person.  Beginning to see my surroundings as familiar.  I start off numb, emotional midweek, changed by the time I return home. A transformative experience. Blessed to be here amongst beautiful, Haitian people where God's grace is apparent.

Mission comes in many ways, shapes, forms whether in places like Haiti and Dominican Republic, or right here in Northborough; through traveling distances or sewing tote bags, collecting donations, sharing the story.

What is your mission?

Where is God calling you to serve?

How do you let go of – release your ideas of common sense, security, fear and let God take over?

When do you sit in silence, take pause and listen – just ---listen.


Who do you hear?

What is God saying?

Where is God leading you?




When is the time to follow?

How will you serve?


To know when to not let fear interfere.
















1 comment:

  1. Karen, I am covered in goosebumps reading this. What an inspirational journey that reaches out to everyone to explore their own soul for their own "mission". Thank you for sharing it!
    Love, Michele~

    ReplyDelete